With a gothic-horror aesthetic and a fearsome melodic flair, Eilish has inspired Nirvana levels of devotion among the world’s teenagers. So why doesn’t she feel safe on stage any more?
‘I can’t even explain it to sound normal – I was in love with him,” says Billie Eilish, staring out of the hotel window, her heavy eyes – usually filled with a look that says “impress me” – now glazed over. She is talking at length about Justin Bieber, saying that “obviously” every girl her age – she’s 17 – had a Bieber phase, but that hers was special. “Everything about me was about him, and everything I did was for him. It was so miserable. It’s not a good feeling to be in love with someone who doesn’t know you exist. I would sob all the time because I loved him too much.”
Teenagers are already having their Billie Eilish phase. Ask anyone between the ages of 11 and 19 about her, and they will say she has been famous since 2015, when as a 14-year-old she uploaded her indie ballad Ocean Eyes, written by her older brother, to the internet. They will mention her distinctive style, a swamp of bright colours and chains, a look equal parts SoundCloud rapper and Sesame Street character. They’ll also add that she has 14.2 million followers on Instagram, and that Lana Del Rey and Dave Grohl are fans. Grohl has compared her devotees to those of Nirvana. Ask any of the hundreds of girls who have been camping outside the Shepherd’s Bush Empire in early March to see her play three consecutive sold-out dates, and they will laugh at the fact that adults don’t know who she is; that she’s their secret. They would probably say their Billie Eilish phase is different.
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